Sunday morning again?

Time flies … and how is it September already?

Sitting on my sofa with all the windows open. Today is going to be hot again. It looks like we’re at the start of a new heatwave. I saw the sunrise from bed. It was beautiful. It’s now 8.15 AM and I’m starting to type not really knowing where this will lead. I had a great week at my new job – busy, but interesting.

So, this just popped into my head. I have very conflicted feelings about first class and second class cars on trains. Since my working hours are not as flexible at the moment as I’m used to, I’m stuck on some of the busiest trains in the morning and again after work. I can get a first-class upgrade to my train pass. It does make all the difference. It’s not just more space and tables to do some writing, it’s fewer people. But then - enter: ENTITLEMENT. There might be fewer people, but oh the entitlement that’s in the air. I’m having trouble stomaching that. I got an upgrade for one month and I’m really not sure if I want to keep paying more. Stay tuned.

This week I was also reminded that we all communicate from our own little world and sometimes there is miscommunication. Like when you agree to meet a friend on a specific day and one of you assumes it’s after work and for the other it’s obvious that you’re having lunch. We literally never talked about even approximate times – as it was so obvious to both of us. Then came the day … We’ve postponed and agreed to work on our communication. Makes me smile now and also wonder how often this happens when we don’t even realize it.

I have so many friends around the world, and I can only communicate from my Swiss perspective. I’m of course aware of cultural differences and have lived abroad, but I’m still very much Swiss. I don’t think you ever lose those roots. When I talk about trains being late, it’s usually a few minutes. When Germans talk about trains being late it can be hours. This is just a simple example. Then I talked to a friend about Swiss salaries and because of what had just happened regarding lunch and after work drinks, I made sure we were talking about similar ranges in salaries when we said low-income/high-income job. In this case we were. Note to self: general statements might need to be made more precise as not to be misunderstood.

Now thinking of age and how my perception of “old” has changed over the years. We talked about this at work this week as well. “Old” is relative. And to kids just starting their apprenticeship – I’m clearly old. I don’t feel old, but from their point of view I am. It reminded me of my students at the last High School I taught at whispering to each other to get my age correct. I had asked them what they would consider “middle-aged”, “old”, “young” and I can’t remember what other group there was in that exercise. They wanted to make sure they didn’t call me old by accident. It was such a sweet moment. Still makes me smile today.

I’ve been reconsidering some trauma topics and started re-writing articles for my other newsletter. I think I’ll be posting there soonish. Forgiveness seems to be a topic that wants to be written about right now. Also, I’ve started reading a book called “The Body keeps the Score” and chapter one already had me putting so many comments in the margins that I feel I will have to write something about each of the chapters. Chapter 1: Shame – such an important topic in trauma recovery. And I will definitely write about PTSD and childhood trauma. Ever since I started looking at my trauma as PTSD, I was able to let go of more and more of the guilt and shame that came with it. It’s an ongoing process. Just one more thing on war veterans and traumatized children. There are 10 such children to one war veteran -something to think about. Both groups need proper help. PTSD is not something that can be solved by looking forward and forgetting the past. Stay tuned on more on this topic in my other newsletter.

Can you guys believe that it’s September already? Where did this year go? I feel like I’ve achieved nothing … then I remember that I’ve achieved so freaking much it’s not even real. Not everything is visible to everybody, but I think my friends have noticed some changes. What a healing journey it has been and continues to be. Apologies to North Carolina for using the word “journey”. If I could remember the word my friends in Colorado didn’t want me to use, I would totally put it here as well. I know I have it written down somewhere. Anyway, I could have fallen flat on my face, but took a risk and landed firmly on my feet. TRUST YOURSELVES is all I can say. And I know that I have at least one friend who will understand when I say that I was never really worried, that I always knew that things were going to work out if I just trusted myself and when for what I wanted. Following the dream. Doing it my way. Taking a job because I need to pay the bills. Moving in the right direction. Thanks for helping me believe in myself. You know who you are.

I don’t know how everybody else’s view of friendship has changed during the pandemic. I never thought I could make the kind of friends I have made over the past three years ONLINE. Yes, I have met many of them in real life now, but how unbelievably cool is this? The connections are real, whether they are on Zoom, in emails, in chat messages … Feeling incredibly lucky and grateful.

Now, it’s one hour later - 9.15. Just need to find a picture to add so I can publish this. Have a lovely Sunday everybody!

Saw these gorgeous creatures during my walk yesterday - River Rhine near Leibstadt

One last thing - I love it when people comment on my newsletters and I always appreciate other points of view. And I was reminded this week – we all communicate from our own perspective. Happy for people to add topics or just other things to consider. Keep your comments coming. Sometimes new newsletters are triggered that way, and I love that. I do have one request though; can we try and avoid whataboutisms? If I rant about one thing that doesn’t automatically mean that I’m okay with everything else. Thanks!